Archive for the ‘Personal Development’ Category
Networking as Savings
Posted by emmett in Career Development, Personal Development on April 11th, 2011
Your Network Piggy Bank
When you were a child did you have a “piggy bank”? My guess is that you did or at least some type of bank in which you tried to save some of the money that you parent, grandparents, or tooth fairy gave you. But why did you save the money? Well, beside answering “My parents made me” you may have decided to save up in order to buy something that was going to cost more money than you had in you hot little hands.
As you dropped the coins into the slot you hear them “clink” against each other and the side of the bank and you dreamed of the special thing you were going to buy … when you had save enough. Week after week, month after month you squirreled away your nickel, dimes and quarters all the while thinking of that object you wanted.
But time passed, you grew impatient, and at some point you lost sight of goal of your saving. You may have stopped saving. The thing you were saving for seemed too distant. It was taking too long. Perhaps some other thing caught your eye and became the focus of you attention, something that you could get NOW with the money you all ready had.
You may have taken the plug out of the bottom and took a little of the cash, you may have turned it upside down and slid a butter knife into the slot while shaking the bank to get some coins to drop out. After all, you thought, “I’ll only take a little of the money” and you wanted what you wanted NOW!
BUT …taking the money put you behind in your savings goal and now the thing you wanted was even farther away. It would take even more time to get it. You’d have to save more money. You’d have to wait longer to get what you wanted. So, in frustration, you gave up on the idea of saving up for something and just took money from the bank and spent it on anything and everything you wanted. Read the rest of this entry »
Lessons on Reflection: Go to Your Room and Think About What You Have Done.
Posted by emmett in Career Development, Personal Development on January 24th, 2010
As a child you may have been sent to your room or made to “sit in the corner” to think about what you did to get you is such a sad position, so usually you were in trouble. While in your room, feeling isolated from all human contact and alone with your thoughts you were supposed to think about what you did, feel sorry for your actions and their consequences, apologize for what you did, make amends for what you did if possible, and promise never to do it again. Or at least that’s what you parents wanted you to do.
As much as we hated being sent to our rooms it was our earliest training on learning the importance of reflection about ourselves and our actions. These early efforts by the authority figures in our lives to get us to reflect actually laid the foundation and served to teach us the value of pausing to consider, ponder, question, think and reflect all in a critical way about our issues, problems, success, failures, and plans … our lives.
Unfortunately, since this learning was not taking place under pleasant circumstances. So if we participated in the process at all we did it grudgingly, but usually we feigned the response that was expected of us to get out of the circumstances we found ourselves in. This was also an early form of enlightened self interest … so that we could get back to our agenda, whatever we were doing before we were interrupted by this unreasonable demand to “think about what you have done”. Those demands placed upon us may be part of the reason so few people take the time to reflect and think about their lives, actions, and careers as adults. We don’t do it because it’s not easy, not fun, and we don’t see the benefit in doing it.
How does this relate to career development? Read the rest of this entry »
The Gnosis of Your Success
Posted by emmett in Career Development, Personal Development on October 25th, 2009
Often people will ask me what the secret to success in making a move in career or life. They want that “secret knowledge” that will give them the edge they are seeking to get the thing they desire. These individuals are convinced that there is some knowledge; some technique, some phrase, or some task that they can use or perform that will put them over the top in their quest to obtain the thing they are going after. These folks are looking for what I call the “gnosis of success”.
The truth about the gnosis of success is this Read the rest of this entry »
Diversity: It’s Culture Not Race That Matters
Posted by emmett in Personal Development on July 5th, 2009
Diversity: It’s Culture Not Race That Matters
In my practice as a consultant, trainer, and coach I have often had to address the subject of “Diversity”. It has been my experience that, when asked to consult or train on the topic and even in coaching situations, when people talk about “diversity”– the need to appreciate it; the need to value it—they really have no idea what they are asking for.
What invariably comes up are the issues of Racism, Stereotypes, Ethnocentrism and Political Correctness. In my opinion you cannot handle the topic of “diversity” appropriately unless you are going to take a long hard look at all these issues with an open mind.
In discussing, with my clients, their “needs” around diversity what often times becomes clear is this: they are not interested in “diversity”, true diversity, what they want is “political correctness” If that is what they settle on and I cannot move them off that idea I end the relationship with the client. To put it bluntly I don’t do “politically correct” and neither should you.
If however, the client is willing to explore the elements of diversity and desires to move towards a better understanding of true diversity, I’m willing to work with them on the subject and assist them in the implementation diversity initiatives in their organizations or, in the case of coaching clients, their lives.
When dealing in the realm of diversity whether in large or small businesses or private coaching session with individuals I try to educate them to define their terms to avoid confusion and so that they can gain an appreciation for the depths of the issues.
Defining the Terms Read the rest of this entry »
Work-Life Balance or a Balanced Life
Posted by emmett in Personal Development on February 22nd, 2009
The Balanced Life
Work-Life Balance is a hot topic in today’s hectic workplace. Is there such a thing as work-life balance? I don’t particularly like the term. I find that using the term “work-life balance” tends to lead to a dichotomy in the minds of people, as if work and life are two diametrically opposite concepts. They are not. There is not work distinctly set apart from life, or more precisely, the rest of your life there is only Life with work as one aspect of it that must be kept in balance with all the other aspects or parts of your life.
While I may be a proponent of the idea of work-life balance as it is traditionally expounded, I do however strongly believe and coach “Life Balance”. As the term indicates, my contention is that we need to think in terms of life in its totality, life as a whole, the sum of all that parts that make it up. Work is part of life and does not stand alone outside of it, or worse in opposition to it. As part of this view I contend that our lives, while being made up of many roles or parts, should not be and cannot be compartmentalized in to separate little boxes or individual domains.
Your life consists of many parts or many roles most of which you perform at the same time. You are a parent, spouse, child, employee, employer, a sibling, a community leader, church leader, a volunteer, co-worker, and on and on the roles go. They all add up to your life. To be happy, to find contentment, you need to find the balance between all those roles in your life and not just “work” and the rest of your life.
In a society and culture that tells us we can “have it all” trying to balance the demands of work, family, and all your other commitments is a real challenge. The more roles we play in our lives the more hectic they become. The more we take on because we can’t say “no” … for whatever reason … the greater the possibility that our life will come off its axis and spin out of control. The truth of the matter is that very few of us, if any, can “have it all”. Each of us has our limitations. Whether we care to admit it or not we cannot do everything and be everything to everyone. The first step towards achieving a balanced life is to face or own limitations. Read the rest of this entry »